Welcome to the World Milo!

Well its been a bit longer than I had hoped, you are now 3 months old and I haven't yet put down a tiny thing about you... I feel a little guilty, but forgive me, for with a Newborn and a strong minded toddler...there hasn't been much time!

I used to write things about your big brother Theo when I was feeding, or in the middle of the night...but these days I am just so tired I drop to sleep too quickly to write. If I'm not sleeping, or feeding, I am gazing at you, analysing your little face whilst you sleep, those little smiles, revelling in how wonderful you are.

As I said I have very little time between the two of you, we are breastfeeding, you and I, and I tell you what, you are a natural! From birth you latched on great, glugging away for 40 mins at a time...we had a few difficult days (where you fed for 5 hours at a time) and I was so terribly sore and thought we wouldn't succeed. I was bleeding and you were starving (not surprised..you were 10lb 3 born!) After some antibiotics for mastitis later and bath feeds..we were back on track and we haven't looked back!

The Dr's at the hospital said you were "absolutely perfect" (not that I needed reassuring) and you have been gaining on average 1lb a week!! You are a really big boy...but still my tiny baby. You have dark hair just like your brother did and your eyes are the brightest blue. I have a sneaky feeling they might stay that way...and then you might look a bit more like me...as currently you are both Daddy's mini me's!!!

You are starting to look like YOU now, at first you were so like your brother at birth you could have been the same baby! Twins almost 2 years apart... but you have now developed you own little expressions and you can see the little differences in looks and personality.

I tell you what, I am so, so lucky in how wonderful your little temprement is. You truly are the most content baby I have met..you are so happy, at first you were a little serious and hard to get a smile out of...
But now your little face falls into smiles all the time. You are just so beautiful and so happy, truly contented (I think it's the full tum!) I adore to just watch you. As well as bigger, you are much stronger than an average 3 month old baby and you have been throughout.

The Dr had to ask If I was sure you were only 6weeks at your check as you were as strong and as big as a 3month old then! I think I'm going to have my hands full with you! You can already roll a bit and almost pull yourself to sitting!

You are going through clothes at an insane rate and I am just so lucky Gran D is shop happy! You will never be short of anything while she enjoys shopping!

You love your dummy...I wasn't going to give you one (but after those 5 hr feeds) found that you needed it to help get you to sleep. You are great with it, and it really helps to get you to sleep, especially whilst you are teething...little dribble monster! I don't give you it unless you are due to sleep as I like to see you smile during the day!

You are quite a good sleeper...I am sure you would be even better if Theo didn't wake you every 5 minutes with his clodhopper feet jumping around, but he doesn't understand. He loves you very much and has been calling you "Baby" for 3 months, however we have now had one "Milo" and a few "Miley"s. He always checks you are coming with us, and isn't too keen on people he doesn't know holding you. You are his "Miley" of which he lets people know, "No my baby!"
He kisses you on the head (with sound effects.."MwAh" and shakes your arm (quite hard) shouting "Hewow" ....we are working on gentle...but you don't seem to mind, you just smile away in your happy little way, loving everything in little Milo land.

In honesty I was worried about what it was going to be like with 2 babies, and I couldn't comprehend how I could possibly have enough love for a 2nd baby...but My oh my...I was so wrong.
You truly are the most special little being, and I love you more than I can possibly express. You are edible! I am desperate to keep you little (although you are huge already!) Yet cannot wait to watch you grow and develop! I do love you so much at this little stage. You are perfect.

Already I am mourning the loss of each little stage that passes, I remember doing that with Theo...yet it seems more poignant this time. The little newborn milky stretch was a big one ...with your little bum and back arched like a snail...just so perfect. I am just trying to soak in as much as I can, try to absorb as much of this baby stage as possible, It is definitely harder this time around to just 'be' with you as there are a million other things happening all the time, but I try, everyday to take time out for just us.

My favourite things are sharing a bath with you, swimming (which you love) and playing 'mummy wobble head' where i shake my bun around on my head and it really makes you cackle laughing! I think there are probably some drivers laughing too, as it is definitely a favourite of yours on a pram walk...

Well now I am feeling exhausted, again...after a busy day, and having just finshed putting the 3rd size of too small clothes away into bags, so I am going to catch some sleep while you do!

You are lying in the co-sleeper sleeping soundly...so beautiful.

I am truly overjoyed and the happiest I have ever been. So many wonderful things to come...Welcome to the World Baby Milo, we're going to have an amazing adventure! Xxxx

Letting go....

Today has been tiring, but lovely. We have been swimming with Daddy at Aqua tots, and as usual you were elated to be there. You walked in by yourself today, kicking and splashing, desperate to jump in and go, like the little duck you have become.

Aside from swimming we have played 'village' with all your little people and the cottage, putting policemen to bed and fireman in the bath.. and of course we had the school children running the emergency services! We laughed as I did all the different accents for each person, and you started to gabble away too, making them chat to each other. I love watching your imagination develop.

My definite highlight of today however is your new singing. "Let it gooooo, LET IT GOOOO...." which happened for the first time yesterday, yet today from the kitchen I heard " Let it goooo, LET IT GOOOOO....no do do do anymoooo" (to the tune) ...you just randomly burst into song. It was hilarious! I am both proud and tickled at your funny little ways.

A lot of today was spent rearranging furniture and cupboards, for you and the new baby. We were mostly drilling things to the wall..and moving your room around. Most importantly today, my single bed that I have been sleeping on;  in your room (for 18 months) has been dismantled....and you and getting to have your room all to yourself! Loads more space to play! 

We have made a play area by your bookshelves and  a quiet 'story corner' with a brand new 'chair bed' comfy seat (in case you need me or someone to sleep in with you at any point.)  

Your soft glow moon light is above it with a bookcase. It looks really lovely, and your little face was a picture when I took you up to see it, you were so shocked, with your little hand gestures...followed by "wow" in your tuneful little tone. 

You certainly seemed to like it... and there were no complaints from you at all at bed time. In fact you were quite eager to hop into bed with your milk... so grown up!

As I anxiously ponder over whether to turn off the landing light or not, while you sleep so soundly in your perfect little dreamworld, snuggled in your toddler bed with your favourite toys. It is safe to say you are more ready to grow up, than I am ready to let go of what we have had; just the two of us and our bed time snuggles. I am pretty sure I know who will be getting the better sleep tonight.... night night Theo, my darling boy, my chubby little cherub chops.... Until Morning xx

To Theo - 18 months

I seriously cannot comprehend the speed in which things are changing, growing and developing at the moment!

Theo,

From taking your first little steps 2 weeks before your 1st birthday, to positively walking 2 weeks after it, everything is happening so quick!  Now... well I can barely keep up! You run everywhere!!! In circles, back and forth, you name it, you climbs the stairs like a pro (but are not quite so competent on the way down) I have been trying to teach you to come down on your bum, but you would much rather slide down on your tummy, and then laugh (the most beautiful and infectious laugh) when I tell you that you are being a monkey!

You love pushing boundaries...and at this age, that is exactly what you are meant to be doing, you turn to me regularly when you are unsure, to gauge my reaction as to whether you are doing something you shouldn't or not. My current favourite is your little tuneful "uh oh" and "oh dear" when you think you have done something 'wrong'. It truly is the cutest thing... and even though there may be spaghetti all over the floor,  your apparent awareness of your 'mistake' of plate throwing (as one example) even though it is usually 'accidently on purpose' really shows your understanding of this crazy big and confusing world you are a part of.

You absolutely love to snuggle and cuddle, especially when there is a film on, you now come and sit on my lap and rest you head on me, especially if you are a bit tired and nuzzle yourself in. These moments are perfect. I feel so lucky that you are such a loving and affectionate little being. You are pretty generous with your kisses now too, regularly coming over just to give me a kiss, because you want to, and not because you have been asked. I love that. 

Waving! Well waving has been an off and on thing over the last 6 months, you have had the capability, but lacked the urge to bother to wave 'hi' or 'bye' for quite some time. In the last month though you have started to wave and sing "Hiiii" or "Byeeee" (depending on which is relevant) in your ever so tuneful song voice, to almost all that you meet...to me, Dolly, Daddy, Grandma, the lady behind the till, the man buying bread, the security guard at Tesco... yep you are a friendly little soul!

If you are not waving and saying hiya to strangers a plenty, you can be sure to find that you will give them a little dance, stomping your feet and wiggling for a reaction (you are a born showman!)
Either that or you will be offering up your juice and toys to others in the doctors waiting room, supermarket, restaurant...etc etc.

You are a very kind little boy, who loves to explore his surroundings, making friends with all the ladies,  charming  your way to a 'sweety' and a smile. I have a feeling that charm will stick with you throughout life. That smile and those dimples will get you a long way...

Your best friend is Sofia, we met her when u were 3 months old and she was 6.5 months. You two see each other weekly (sometimes more, sometimes less) and we go on lovely days out swimming or to soft play, for dinner and to the parks etc. You two are real partners in crime, wild and free, wearing us poor mummies out!! But we wouldn't have you any other way!

Talking about swimming, your dad and I take you swimming every Tuesday morning, and from your first dip in the water, I knew you were a water baby! I first took you at 3 months old, and you were content then. I held you in the water letting you slowly gain your confidence bit by bit.. and now at 18 months you are practically a fish! You wear little foam floats on your arms and swim round, unaided by me or your daddy. You laugh and splash and jump in the water without a care in the world. You are physically strong and you are very brave, carefree and such fun to be with.

As well as swimming we take you to gymnastics.. and you have come on in leaps and bounds since the first time we took you. You use the trampoline and do forward rolls and even practice them at home! Your favourite thing is to run about though and throw the balls on the parachute at the end.

You are so clever and developing in so many ways, you now say your animal noises for 'dinosaur' - raaaaar 'cow' - mooo 'duck' - quack quack and 'dog' - woofwoof! You also have tons of words that keep popping out of nowhere...! Your first proper word apart from Mummy and Daddy was probably Dolly, and you shout up the stairs "doyey...doyey" every morning for her to come down and play with you. You love her!

Your first sentence (apart from "where's doyey")  was 2 days before xmas at Bubbles Soft Play where you said "mummy where are you??....where are you mummy??" I was right behind you, but were so busy exploring the 'big kids bit' you panicked for a moment... i was sooo proud, I had no idea you knew so much!

You are a fruit bat! You love love love strawberries and blueberries...so much so, we are going to grow them this year just to keep up with your tummy's demand! As for other food you are much more picky than you were...yet you are getting better. Your absolute favourite veg is corn on the cob, and you devour every morsel! You are also a big fan of chips (no surprises) and spaghetti... very funny to watch you eat that with a fork... but not for the faint hearted! (I spend a lot of time bleaching the floor!)

Well it is getting late now, and I am really due some sleep...as last night I didn't sleep at all. I have taken  the side of your cot you see, and you are doing really well. AMAZING in fact. You have never been a good sleeper, and in fact we have practically co-slept for 18 months...as I can count on my hands the nights you have stayed in your cot all night...you usually end up in with me from as soon as you first stir. But not the last couple of nights. I am still sleeping in your bedroom (I am the clingy one!) I feel happier that way...but you are getting bigger now...and I soon will have to sleep with your new baby brother, so it is only fair to get you settled and happy in your big bed by yourself. I am watching your chest rise and fall in perfect sleepy peace, and realising it is me with the problem! I have separation anxiety and cannot sleep... ! But I am being good...last night you woke, and I sat next to your little 'big boy bed' and sang every Disney song I could think of for 40 mins... until you drifted back off into dreams. How much I wanted to scoop you up and hold you close to me, but I have to let you grow.

I wish I could freeze time sometimes to spend a little longer enjoying everything...as life is moving so quickly...  you are at the most perfect stages right now, everything is new and exciting for you, everything is a 'first' and I can barely keep up. But my mission is to just enjoy every single moment, every tired tantrum and every sleepy snuggle, every hysterical giggle, playing dinosaurs and tickle... for one day you will be big and the kisses you give me won't be so 'cool'...  I wish you could be my baby forever! You will never know how much you mean to me, how much I love you, and how my life revolves around you. Only when you are big and grown and have your own babies will you understand. I now know true love, and you are mine. My beautiful little bundle of joy, my forever perfect baby boy xxx

2015 you have been amazing...

Well what can I say... 2015 you truly have been the best year of my life so far!

There is so much I want to say about how wonderful life has been this last year, and my only sorrow lies in how quickly time has passed, and how many amazing moments are now merely memories, making way for more.

2015 is the year I failed at blogging! Yes I definitely failed there, but in hindsight...I don't care. I mean, I absoloutely wish in some ways I had documented everything in writing, rather than just in copious amounts of facebook photographs, and status's about Soft Play...but we really have been just too busy. Too busy having fun, enjoying the moment, working hard at other things (not to mention dealing with the mandatory pregnancy exhaustion and sickness.)
Don't get me wrong though, documenting/journaling my boy's life is of massive importance to me. I want to leave our little legacy of memories down on paper (or floating in a tiny morsel of web space) in the hope they can be revisited in the future; by our older selves. So we can look back at how things have changed, and laugh, and cry, remembering what has gone before. I read my last post (the letter to my son poem) before writing this, and realised how much has already slipped my mind, and how many things I haven't written down that I wanted to since then.

I feel that because I started a 'blog' I suppose I felt over pressured to create 'content' as people might read it... and not just being true to what 'Being Mamma' is about. Which is just that. A diary of what it is like 'being mamma.'

Therefore I am going to use this as just that. A diary, a log of our adventures, with some cute pictures along the way. Documenting the things that feel important, and the emotions along the way. I am not doing this to please other people, but to look back and be pleased that I spent a moment to reflect on what I wonderful time I am having.

This in itself has felt cathartic, as I was feeling pressure from myself just to put something down to explain why I hadn't kept up with it...but seriously. Life happens..and you just have to go with it... so here we go! X

Silly poem to my baby. May I never forget this time x

A letter to my baby, 

you're only 10 months old

getting stronger everyday,

(and heavier to hold)

I felt I had to put this down,

In so short time, you've come so far, 

And I dare not forget a moment, 

of how wonderful you are.          

You now stand unaided,

'Testing' every door, 

Such a sense of accomplishment,

Pulling open every drawer.

Your mobility amazes me,

already learned to climb the stairs,

cruising around the living room, 

supported by the chairs.

Your energy is unstoppable,

Until the time you go to bed,

Exploring every inch of ground,

(I need eyes in the back of my head!)

So I  tidy and I hoover,

I think I've managed every chore,

and you still find every little fluff,

that lingers on the floor...

 I'm sure it isn't tasty

but determined, you'll still try, 

and like lightning crawl away from me,

a cheeky glint across your eye.

Everything is an adventure,

so many things brand new ,

Often I wish I could see things,

from your sweet unjaded view.

Your laugh, it is infectious,

It never fails to make me smile

your sense of humour (so developed)

for such a tiny little guy

You feel emotions deeply

clench your fists and shout, when mad.

I can't help but chuckle to myself,

you're such a funny little lad,

There's only one food, that you don't like,

Blue veined Stilton cheese,

everything else goes down a treat

(especially strawberries and ice cream) 

Your a showman, love the lime light,

do lots of actions with your arms, 

you flirt with all the ladies,

with your cutest baby charm.

You love to be praised for doing things,

and turn to me, for reaction, 

playing games and reading stories,

you love the interaction, 

As for TV it's Waybaloo

that currently has your vote

and Disney films with singing in

(as you chew on the remote)

I think Queen Elsa' is still a favourite,

With that song, 'Let it go'

For the millionth time I've heard her, 

watched her running in the snow.

Dolly fast becomes a faithful friend 

both playing tug of war, 

but you are still a bit too interested 

in her tail, ears and paws.

You babble away, your made up words

a language sweet divine, 

you say say 'Muma', 'Dada', 'Hiya' too

and 'Yea' all the time 

There's very little that you hate, 

but getting dressed is number one, 

in 2nd place, closely behind,

Is the changing of your bum

The bath, is a favourite place, 

with rubber ducks and bubbles 

followed by a towel rub, 

and lovely mummy snuggles

Now your bathed and changed, and in your bed 

but of course it won't last long

your not quite yet accustomed 

to sleeping on your own.

But for a couple of hours i'll watch you,

on the baby monitor screen, 

chest rising up and down,

drifting in and out of dreams.

And every now and then, 

I'll come upstairs to watch you breathe,

my most amazing creation,

my beloved masterpiece.

Sofa Style Struggles...

After a long wait, my beautiful grey shaded leather sofa has NOT arrived! Safe to say, I'm not impressed, given that it has taken the company 3 weeks to inform me it will not be coming at all...
They apparently can no longer source the fabric. (Even though I was told it would be with me in a few days, TWICE!)

Anyway Rant over, onwards and upwards!

It took me a very, VERY long time to decide on the sofa in the first place, as I have never been a fan of the look of leather sofas, yet with a little mess machine, I thought modern and wipe-able won, over the more desirable teal Chesterfield.

A sofa is a strong focal point within any room design, and as I cannot source this same (or similar) from anywhere else, it looks as though the original living room plans have gone out of the window entirely.

Soft greys, heritage teals and ballet shoe pinks are shades of the past, for this house anyway.Delicate  accents, Moroccan tea-light holders, bohemian drapes and pom pom cushions no longer have a place within the new space; dictated and dominated by a soon to arrive BLACK AND WHITE COUCH!

I cannot believe I have said it, but yes, you read it right. They have offered me a different (more expensive) sofa set, for the same price (due to the inconvenience) a million miles away (to me) from what I had planned.... and I've ACCEPTED.

I am already starting to question this decision, but life throws these obstacles around, and to hell with it, I'm going to make it work. It isn't what I planned (by any stretch) and the sofa is more 'Starship Enterprise meets Formula One' than my intended 'Grey Serenity,' but I'm going with the flow. Room styling has taken a 180.

Here's hoping I CAN actually make it work into an artistic and eclectic space, rather than a tacky boy racer room...

I'm going to be bold (but not as bold as the sofa) and say Italian style and monochrome are always 'in' 'Classic even!?'

Here are some of my styling ideas.

Have I gone entirely mad?










   

Chaos and Cupboards

So a fortnight ago, I wrote that I was moving house, and at that point I hadn't yet picked up a box...and now we're in!

 What a roller coaster it has been. Moving with a tiny 'wannabe toddler' just finding their feet is no task for the faint hearted I tell you! Last time I was moving whilst 8 months pregnant...I learnt both these lessons the hard way. I wave my flag, I am staying put.

So after the boxes being houses themselves, drums, chairs, hats, trampolines and many other objects (other than a box) they finally were filled, and moved to their new place of residence (some still waiting to be unpacked.) The furniture is also in and up, after plenty of dissembling and reassembling. Walls have been painted with help from a painting fairy (my mum) who spent in total approximately 24 hours up and down a ladder with me, in order to make this little house a home.

  I honestly would not have made it to this point without any help. I am the queen of doing everything myself, but I have quickly learnt that when you have a little living being as your main priority, you have to let go of a little control. I can't say I was happy to let go... but needs must, and Wholla, I've handed back my old keys, everything's here, and I'm not too far off schedule!  

Surrounded by chaos and cupboards, room plans awry,  couch-less and losing my mind; yet one day at a time I am getting closer to my desired results.

So far...

The 'nursery' has been painted in Dulux silk 'blue reflection' I am happy with the colour, yet would have preferred a matt finish...  however, sticky fingers have priority!

My room, I have painted 'Crushed Aloe' a gorgeous calming green, it's fresh and airy and only needed one coat!  I absolutely love my woodland view (from almost every window!) and this green really compliments the scenery, bringing the outside in.

The lounge... well this is an interesting one, I chose to mix my own paint, as I couldn't get my desired shade in a silk finish... (greasy palms/sticky fingers problem again) the first coat went on, and it was what most would describe as 'light black.' (Even Abigail Ahern would have been worried) yet luckily enough, after a rough sleep and a remix of the paint; (tutorial to follow) the finished colour is a deep teal, with a dark duck egg on 2 walls. 

What do you think?

I've also been spray painting Ikea Ung Drill picture frames (better late than never on that bandwagon) and white washing bookcases...what would I do without nap time!? Oh and thank you Waybaloo!

More Progress updates to follow!